Monday, September 27, 2010

The Jailhouse Glamour Of Lindsay Lohan

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The Jailhouse Glamour Of Lindsay Lohan


In the future, we are just going to tell time by how frequently Lindsay Lohan’s new mugshot is released. Though it seems like an eternity, it was actually only three Lohan-years-ago when Lindsay’s first jail pic dropped. In memorial we wanted to take a moment and pay homage to the timeless fashion choices Lohan has made in her pretty prison photos:

Summer 2007: An earthy, sun-kissed look, perfect for drunkenly careening through a parking lot as you chase your assistant through the night, or run over a man’s foot. Your mouth will stay gaping open forever once you see Lindsay’s clean, classic look, and the impressive amount of cocaine she’s managed to spill on it.

Fall 2007: What goes with a SCRAM bracelet? Everything. Some might say orange and yellow clash, but tell that to Lindsay’s face and hair. Sam Ronson was one lucky lady, when she wasn’t fending off slap fights. Lindsay may have stayed in jail for only 84 minutes after voluntarily turning herself in for two DUI charges, but hers is a look that will linger in fashion history forever.

Summer 2010: Devil may care! Because Lindsay certainly doesn’t, at least not about her career or professional reputation. Tanner, thinner, and starting her 90-day jail sentence, Lohan works that jumpsuit like she’s on a runway, probably because she’s so high she thinks she’s on a runway. Lindsay’s nails may have said “F*** U” to the judge, but her eyes say, “I’m going to start throwing drinks any minute, just to get your attention.”

Fall 2010: Lindsay Lohan’s most recent mugshot, or as we like to call them, jail-entines, proves Lindsay is once, twice, three times a lady made out of collagen. Lohan is always making bold choices, whether it’s a baby pink lip, a statement eye, or so much plastic surgery and weight-loss that her face looks like it belongs to a completely different person. Lohan also appears to have aged backwards over the course of her mug shots. Are Benjamin Button people the latest fashion trend? We’ll just have to wait for Lindsay’s next drug test to find out. Happy New Lohan Year!

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