Friday, October 1, 2010

Introducing The Younger, Significantly Less Insane Michael Lohan

Introducing The Younger, Significantly Less Insane Michael Lohan

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Rarely seen and sort of hunky (in that Irish no-upper-lip way they all have) Michael Lohan Jr. defended his sister Lindsay after popping his head out of whatever burrow he lives in following his escape from the Lohan sideshow. “People she was surrounded by – enablers, leeches, whatever you’d like to call it – made things very difficult,” Michael told People. “It’s quite strenuous to right your wrongs when the people around you help justify your actions. Therefore, cloudy judgment made it easy for her to neglect those trying to guide her.” Michael then raised his eyebrows up real high and discreetly nodded his head toward the rest of his family.

Predictably, elder Michael Lohan immediately hulked out on ex-wife Dina, blaming her for using Michael Jr. “First, to spread her BS, and second as her new pawn.” Papa Lohan may pouty that he was purposely excluded when Michael said, “We — her mother, brothers, and sister — have been there for Lindsay every step of the way — despite what trashy news reports — and will continue to give her our support and strength during these arduous times,” even though it is a proven scientific fact that Michael  Sr. is a terrible influence on his daughter.

As sane as he appears now, we worry lil’ Mikey Lohan might be tempted to enter the insanity like the rest of his family. Once a Michael Lohan gets a taste of the limelight, there’s no going back. And once a Michael Lohan sees his shadow on the ground, there’s six more weeks of winter!  

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